I started realizing it during my university years…
… and before that, and all along, I thought I was absolutely me. I was a “I think, therefore I am” kind of man. But my joyful achievements, the traumatic events in my life, observing my mind and physical changes suggested to me otherwise.
The question became, 'If it is my mind, why does it sometimes urge me to do things in life, and after doing them, I feel regret over them?' Why doesn't my mind always tell me, its owner, to do the right and good things. And why does my mind constantly (and uncontrollably) think about both pleasant and unpleasant things all the time?
Why are there unwanted feelings like anger, excitements without a cause, depression, mania, hatreds, over expectations, violent things, lust, etc. which alternatively are lingering in our minds. And again, why in my body, does it carry, within its DNA, all the elements that will lead eventually to my death?
Here again is the question, “And who would want to live forever in this body form, and with this mind which contains so many conflicting thoughts? On the other hand, in life and looking back, we are the ones who sow all those seeds, and no one else. Truly, it is a big dilemma…
“Us, but not Us” ?
I had thought on that a lot, and personally came to the conclusion that we are given a 'me factor' by something outside ourselves. We are given a body and a mind, but they are within given limits of “the domain”. (‘Domain’ is the existential set that contains all possibilities and is governed by ‘Method’, which determines the outcome of those possibilities.)
We (in the domain) may be able to levitate. We may be able to be in two places at the same time. We may be able to make our colonization and settlements on Mars, but we can't eat our meal through our ears. We, in our dreams, don't dream about climbing up a mountain on a planet in a different universe that have never envisioned. We exist within limits.
It also seems we are under a limited range of actions, because there are also set rules like, you hold the burning fire in your bare hand, and you won't feel cold. If you go to the gym regularly, then you become healthier. These are set rules that we all understand and obey.
Why are we here?
We collectively define that we are 'us' and that we will eventually die, but, from the point of energy, we observe that no energy ever dies out completely, it just changes form. That is also a set rule. And we all understand and follow those rules as well. But that rule tells us that we will never die, for “we” will become energy, and therefore “we” will never die out even after our own death.
Then why are individuals given that 'me factor' (a term coined by myself) that can do and perform a lot of things within given limited and ranges, but in essence, absolutely, not 'me ?' (“I will die”, and “I will never die” are both rules in the domain.) I think that this is all pointing to the fact that 'the original owner of 'the domain' of everything inside the domain, is exercising or experimenting with something and that point may be for placing who, at which energy levels, at where in the domain, and according to the plays performed by those actors, are those who were given that “me factor”.
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